"Let's talk about sex"

The church I go to in Waterloo, Elevation, is doing a series on some of the most uncomfortable things to talk about, sexuality. Upcoming topics are "Single like Jesus", "The M-word", and "The Homophobic Church". These are really interesting topics as many, myself included, get uncomfortable even though we pretend to be completely comfortable discussing them. Anyways, last week was on sex.

In our culture today, there are 3 major lies we believe in about sex:

1) Sex is only natural

Sex is seen as the natural thing to do. It is everywhere on ads, tv, and rarely do you not hear implications of sex in songs. On the other hand, abstinence is seen as the unnatural, weird, awkward, and it is often made fun of when practiced. There is this mentality that we should just do whatever we want, whenever we feel like, and no need to suppress any urges. What are we animals?

2) Sex is only physical

Because sex is done with another human being, another soul. It is not just physical. Yes it obviously includes the physical, but it is also emotional and relational. Hence this is one of the reason why sometimes it takes people so long to heal from the break up of a physical relationship.

3) Sex is an expression of love

Often in relationships, sex is seen as a goal instead of understanding it as a gift form God. Sex is not the "ultimate expression of love". It is one of the many things that a married couple can share together as they journey and grow together.

But this is what God said:

"It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God." --- 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5

"Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body." --- 1 Corinthians 6:18-20

"Should your springs overflow in the streets,

your streams of water in the public squares?

Let them be yours alone,

never to be shared with strangers." --- Proverbs 5: 16-17

(Let it be yours and your husband/ wife alone. Never share it with another)

But don't forget, there is no shame to sex in the way God intended it...

"The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame." --- Genesis 2:25

Not that you shouldn't have sex at all in your life. Only thing is, it is a gift from God for married couples. We should avoid and flee from sexual immorality (i.e. pornography, having sex outside marriage) Just because you are in a serious dating relationship and is heading towards marriage doesn't mean you get a free ticket to sex right now.

"Love may be blind, but it doesn't mean you should feel your way around." --- Pastor Brandon

A book was recommended: "Real Sex" by Lauren Winner. The author wrote about how sometimes the church can value virginity so much that it makes those who lost it in the wrong place feels like 2nd class. But Christianity is about receiving a 2nd chance from Christ... God's grace, repentance, and forgiveness. And also, how should the Christian community help and support each other?

So, what standard have you set for yourself? Have you even set a standard? Or just feeling your way around?